It’s still important to socialise when you have a stoma

Don't let your stoma keep you at home. Though most things are easier in the comfort of home, it is really important to get back to doing all the things that you were doing before your surgery. That includes going out.

Will it be awkward?

It is only natural to be concerned about having to explain yourself to new people, but remember that you do not owe them an explanation of your condition. Sometimes, preparing a short and confident explanation will help put your mind at ease for the rest of the evening. For instance, you could explain that you've been unwell, and because of that you've had major surgery and now wear an ostomy pouch.

Avoid being too technical and be open to questions - without over-sharing. Never feel you have to explain details of your surgery to everyone who asks.

What about family and friends?

Family and close friends are of course a little bit of a different matter. If you are open and honest with the people close to you, it can help you get back to the life you had before your stoma surgery. It is completely normal if for a while after the surgery you still feel uncomfortable talking about it.

However, as soon as you feel ready to talk about it, let your friends and family know - they will no doubt want to help support you as much as possible.

While many find comfort in talking to their family or close friends, it can also be tremendously helpful to talk to someone with similar experiences about life with an ostomy. Ask your stoma care nurse if it might be possible to put you in contact with others in your situation.

Being active and going out

Even though most things are easier in the comfort of home, it is really important to get back to living and enjoying all the things that you were doing before your surgery. That includes going out. Whether it's a quiet drink in a local bar, a meal out in a restaurant, or visiting friends, nothing should stop you.

Don't rush yourself

To build up your confidence for going out and about, give yourself small targets in the beginning. Perhaps things like using a public toilet for the first time, or visiting a relative, or planning a day away. Gradually you may feel ready to take on further activities, just remember to try and be patient and not to rush yourself.

Pack an 'emergency kit'

When going out, make sure to pack an extra pouch and all the supporting products you might need. The first few times it can be good to bring one more than you will realistically need, just to put your mind at ease. It can also be helpful to bring along disposal bags for your pouch, in case you can't get to a bin.

Think ahead

When you arrive in a new location - be it a restaurant or a friend's house - try to familiarise yourself with the toilet facilities. It can take a lot of stress off your mind if you know in advance where to go when you suddenly need to.